Feeling A Bit Lost

 

I would imagine this is the natural feeling most graduates have when they finish university. Going from knowing exactly what your doing each day and having a ton of work to do to nothing. You suddenly have this thing called free time and can have a moment to think. Third year for me was pretty intense and my stress took it's toll on me. I always moan when I have lots to do but then when I have nothing to do I get so bloody bored. And this is what I'm currently experiencing. I have bagged myself a part time job in a supermarket which I start my training on Thursday which I am so nervous about. All I find myself doing is wondering what's on TV (Jeremy Kyle and Judge Rinder are what I am watching... Yeah judge me cause I'm judging myself), daydreaming about how I would love to write these amazing blog posts with beautiful photos (but in reality I have no one to help me take any pictures) and job searching.
All I'm feeling currently is negative feelings, scared, lonely, worried, anxious I mean I could go on and on. I've always had a sort of structure to what I'm doing. Years and years of school knowing it's your summer holidays and then you start a fresh a new school year in September. Then once sixth form is finished bam here you are heading to university for three years which you think will be ages. But in reality it just flies by. I didn't really take it all in.
I've always said I can't wait to be an adult with my own money, a house etc. But that just seems so far away. Let's hope I start finding the swing of things soon, all I know is I have to escape this house. I need to start taking up walking.
Woo needed to get that off my chest clearly. I'll stop typing now, get a green tea and go listen to some happy tunes.